I don't wanna say I'm frustrated or complain or feel like I'm jynxed. But there are things that have been going on that get me thinking either in my past life I was a shitty person or I honestly have bad luck.
Last week my bag was stolen. Inside it had my essentials. Wallet with cards and pics of those dear to me, my house keys, and my prized ipod (the one thing that keeps me sane). Luckily I had my phone on me. No I didn't see what happened but I have my suspicions and usually I'm right about things.
Now I reacted in a way that some say was too much but others say fair. I terrorized downtown Manhattan by acting in a manner that was brought out by a build up of so much I've been dealing with. Since I quit my job and decided to chase my dreams things haven't been easy at home. My parents feel that I have been wasting my time and have said things that genuinely hurt. I have been looking for work but apparently having a degree only gets you ignored. Its frustrating going to an interview (last week) and figure that its a scam and left once again wondering who's gon call next.
My anxiety also doesn't help.
This build up just exploded when my bag was gone. The little I had taken, and even my id. Some son of a bitch has a piece of me with them and I feel vulnerable. My accounts are frozen until my new cards arrive and my house locks changed.
My life feels like its been paused. Silenced even.
Even with all this though I gotta be glad for the friends who have been with me most of the weekend. To know people have your back is something I can't put into words but it felt good and I guess its what's giving me the strength to not give up.
My only goal now is to get my life back together and be able to walk away from this with a lesson learned.
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